i've been agonizing on whether or not i should make this a public post, but seeing that i've always shared my life on this blog, it doesn't make sense to filter myself this one time...

without getting into too much detail, i'm in the process of working through some difficult feelings i'm having, after learning recently of some things i wasn't aware about in the past. at the moment i'm having insecurity and trust issues, and i'm trying to focus a bit more on myself. until now, i've been blessed (or cursed?) with not having the need to deal with doubt or mistrust, but when i was faced with this situation, the unquestioning faith i once had began to slip through my fingers.

i still have a lot of love in my heart, and i know the feeling is mutual, but there is also hurt, and i can't help but be afraid that i won't be able to bring myself to the point where i can start trusting again. 

i don't feel like i've quite finished writing, but strangely, i also feel i've already written too much, so i'll finish my thoughts with a song i recently wrote.

again, my apologies to my dwindling set of readers. i don't really have a good reason for not having written for a long time. i can only say the events in my daily life haven't been interesting enough to publish.

daniel has recently taken on a new and more demanding role in his company. among these demands include the need for more frequent travel between tokyo and shanghai. this inevitably leaves me with more alone time than i had originally expected when we first arrived here, for better or for worse.

for the most part, i've kept myself busy. my japanese teacher, okada-san, comes in twice a week. while having a normal conversation in japanese is still very much beyond my reach, i am definitely improving. by the end of february, i had memorized the hiragana/katakana characters and in the last few months, began posting status updates in japanese, to much confusion of my mostly non-japanese friends. progress has been slow, but i've certainly come a long way since december.

since march, i've been teaching piano twice a week at my apartment. my parents have constantly suggested that i teach piano back in vancouver, but i resisted, preferring the daily office grind, and also not believing i would be a good or patient teacher. i still don't know if i'm a good teacher or not, but i thoroughly enjoy teaching and it's certainly something i would consider doing at my next destination, wherever that may be.

i've recently been recruited by a japanese translation/localization agency as a proofreader. the work is assignment-based, and on average i would find myself working on a new proofreading job offer every 2 or 3 days. subconciously, i've always proofread everything i've come across, from store signs to facebook posts, so i enjoy the challenge that comes with the assignments, which range from business to pharmaceutical documents. while i sometimes wish the offers would come more frequently, i never thought i would land such a gig in the first place, and in japan of all places, so i'm grateful for the opportunity to flex my editing muscles.

music-wise, i do have more interesting news to share. i recently played a second show at the pink cow (and my third overall in tokyo) in support of my very talented friend martin leroux. it was 80's night so we prepared cover versions of our favourite songs from the era, including songs by taylor dayne, depeche mode, and sade. i really enjoy performing at the cow, mostly because of the mainly-foreigner audience (i've played to a completely japanese audience once so far, which i've found to be slightly too polite for my liking). i even invited okada-san to join us for the evening. it was a fantastic night.

i realize i may sound like a bit of a jerk in saying this, but having more extra time than i know what to do with is definitely overrated, but on the positive side, it's allowed me to make more cover videos on youtube. one of them, my cover of famed hong kong producer anthony wong's 罅隙 (rift), even caught the attention of anthony himself, who urged his facebook followers to give my version a listen. i was speechless - anthony is well-respected in the hong kong music industry and i've looked up to him for more than a decade - to earn his acknowledgement was an ego-booster to say the least.



i've also had the pleasure of working with an amazing up and coming singer/songwriter, annmarie fox, whom i met while randomly searching for beyonce cover videos. i initially left a comment on one of her videos, not thinking in a million years that out of the hundreds of comments she receives daily, she would actually message me back and express interest in working with me. long story short, we ended up making two beyonce cover videos (here and here), one for the new maroon 5/christina aguilera tune "moves like jagger" (which can be viewed here) and yet another in honour of the late r&b songstress aaliyah (below), which also featured martin on guitars. most of these videos have achieved many times more views than i have ever earned on any cover video i've made alone, proof that collaboration brings greater exposure to your art. all of them were edited with adobe premiere, which i've recently started learning to use, and while i'm hardly an expert, i've started to develop a real interest in the craft. more videos are on the way!



sadly, i haven't been quite as productive with my own songwriting. most of the attempts i've made at my piano were unfruitful. however, the recent storm brought about by typhoon 15 actually helped to inspire two new songs, one of which i wrote and recorded about an hour. the lyrics and melody just seemed to pour from my brain. creativity is a strange animal. i sent the other song to annmarie to get her input and hopefully i'll have something for you soon!

jace - Ribbon and Remorse by jace829

i'm excited to announce that my solo album, "from behind the mirror," has now been released! i've been posting a lot about the songs i've been working on, some of which have been written as early as 2007, and as i was looking through my playlist, i realized i had enough material to put together a record.

originally, i hadn't expected to release a solo album at all. i had always written songs with the intent that they would be performed by locus, but some of them were deeply personal and i wasn't ready for anyone to hear them. at the time, i was very unsure about my ability as a vocalist and the thought of performing by myself without my bandmates left me feeling very vulnerable.

over time, i learned to overcome this by performing youtube covers in front of my webcam. i gradually became more and more comfortable with the sound of my own voice. the consistent practice helped me develop strength in my vocals as well as the confidence i was lacking, and the positive response by other youtube users was encouraging. of course, winning a cover contest with my video being personally selected by ace of base singer jenny berggren did help to boost my ego significantly!

last month, i found myself performing my very first solo set in japan. when i was invited to play, i had asked that i not be given my own set, as i was only expecting to support some of the other acts on keyboards. due to a scheduling conflict with another performer, i was placed into an hour-long set on my own. i originally asked to be taken off the set, but after some thought, i decided i would try, and began preparing a set of original tunes punctuated with a few covers. it turned out to be one of my most rewarding experiences as a performer, and i have my new musician friends in tokyo to thank for forcing me to confront my fears and stand on stage alone for the first time.

for this reason, i titled the album from behind the mirror. the mirror is one of the many places we're forced to see the kinds of flaws that make us feel uncomfortable. with this newfound confidence, i was finally ready to face my insecurities and let the world hear my voice.

i consider myself more of a collaborator in the sense that my strongest work comes from writing with other people. for this reason, several of the songs feature appearances by other writers, in particular, my brother, kelvin chu, cantopop lyricist 曰云@sense (who contributed to several of locus' songs in the past), and chinese rock group one arm bear's lead singer patrick lee.

most of the songs have already been discussed in my recent posts, so i won't go into detail about each track. some of them have been re-tooled slightly but otherwise there won't any major differences with what you may have heard on my soundcloud page. as an incentive, i do have some bonus material from the recording sessions that i can send via email for those who have purchased the album. =)

from behind the mirror is available via nimbit music.

tracklisting

1. a thousand voices
   
2. you don't know
3. if i were
4. he's beautiful
5. forbidden fruit
6. 沒有腳步聲的螞蟻
7. moment of weakness
8. song for oplontis
9. spirits coming down
   
10. 話到口邊 (piano version)
11. gift exchange